i love you

and by you.
i mean me.

and by me.
i mean
i love me

by myself.




i hope ur havn fun tonite.
i hope ur smiling wide.
everytime i hear that song.
i die a lil inside.

[ this poem courtesy of PBR ]



I heard you stabbed a guy once!

you can get your ass pistolwhipped
with a nine
or a .45
or a henny fifth.
we fight dirty till we die
nigga get your throat slit.
then we stomp you to the ground
and then we throw your arm a clip.

we don't give a fuck.


[ im sure this is a bad idea..... ]


lost for words.

ive got alot to say.
but for right now.

hands remember.



im sure you'll be the death of me.



Why aren't you dating anyone?

dont forget what i told you.
dont come around.
ive got my own hell to raise.

[ im sure this is a bad idea..... ]

josh smalls: waterwings.

all this means
is im to well versed in all the modern scenes.


shh...im reading.

knut hamsun


a friend indeed.

this is love.


do you know what i love the most?

alright, okay. you win.



Who is the "Him" you often refer to on your blog?

there are, have been, will be many "him"s.
he's a metaphor.
hes me.
hes them.
and im guessing if you have to ask.
then obviously.
he's not you.

[ im sure this is a bad idea..... ]


under the weather.


hey you.

make my day.


What's your biggest phobia?

i watch was too much forensic files, so im always creeped out that im gonna be murdered and chopped up into little pieces and then no one finds me so i get eatn by lil forest animals, which isnt bad because i love the forest, but i really wanted to be be baked into weed brownies and fed to all my friends....
oh wait.
whats was that?

[ im sure this is a bad idea..... ]

sidelights on relativity.

its past due.
the seats at the table of time.
are slowly filling.

my time.
during these past hundreds of days.
as been something of change.
like the weather.
and my hair.

ive been staying up to watch the sunrise.
and laying down to spite myself.

ive been sitting in seedy place.
with shady faces.
ive been smoozing and boozing my way.
through the week.

on any givin tuesday
im having a two saturday nights.
and a friday afternoon.

so it seems that.
with all these nights I cant remember.

ive never felt so much like myself.
like the girl I used to be.
the one without wake up calls.
and preconceived notions.
sleep schedules.
that girl without shoes.

all these calenders
ive got them everywhere.
each date different.
although each date feels the same.
just as plain.

they smile.
i smile.
i sit.
they respond.
i repeat.
and my mind wanders.

else where.

to others.
to tomorrow and the day before.
to later on.

and him.

with his arrogance.
and my modestness.
impassive to their questions and glances.
arms length and pillow talk.
taking precedent of everyone elses opinions.
in continuum.

and else where.
the clock changes.
its all over their faces.
unbeknownst to us.

we both understand.
while it taste the same.
this is no killer.
all filler.
something to pass.

but in the meantime.
and the inbetween times.

for me.
its barstool and back rooms.
and smiling.
and sitting.
and wandering.
asking myself how many hours in the day.
and bottles does it take
to peel the label.
off of me.



please, rewind.






where have i been.
with all this falling from the sky.

my head involuntary reactions.
to my heart.

learning not to lean.
reading inbetween.

this winter has proven.
something of contentment.

between bedsheets.
and street signs.
somehow ive still found the time.
to let go.

ive been spreading myself.
opening my arms.
closing doors.

behind them theres lights and whispers.
and sudden movements.
and snow.

the whiteness.
blacks out any misconceptions.
rearranges my reflection.
showing them what they want to see.

standing above.
looking up.
theres nothing else to talk about.
but the weather.
and me.


ask and you shall receive....


The Bloody Richmond.

RVA's very own Bloody Mary
made using all local ingredients.


Cirrus is a locally distilled and bottled Vodka made from additive free potatoes and natural deep aquifer spring water. It has a creamy taste with a hint of vanilla and a light, smooth sweetness. Unlike most vodkas, which are mass produced, Cirrus is hand-crafted in small batches. Made in a traditional pot-still, Cirrus is an artisan vodka made only from the highest quality potatoes.

SBA's Outstanding Woman Entrepreneur honoree, Pamela Barefoot founded Blue Crab Bay Co. in 1985 from her seaside farmhouse kitchen, since then she has created a empire focused on highlighting the wonderful taste of the Chesapeake Bay. Sting Ray is a spicy Bloody Mary mixer with clam juice and a thick and rich blend of clam and tomato juices spiced with our Chesapeake Bay Seasoning and freshly grated horseradish.

keep it bloody.
keep it local.

all of the items above
are available at your local VA ABC store,
or directly through merchants site.


hey thanks bob dylan.

spring forward.
fall back.

not only are the day longer.
but i am too.

growing so much.
upwards and downwards.
inwards and outwards.

three years into my second decade
and it seems that all ive learned
is that you never

life is ever changing.
shaping us.

we are the variables.
and our destinies we can change.
and yet we are taught these lessons.
but the results are all the same.

with out passion.
there is no pleasure.
where there is no struggle.
there is no gain.

one would think we'd be born with this instinct.
and avoid ourselves the pain.
and yet it seems we constantly eat the apple.
choking it down to the core.

johnny appleseed.
always wanting more.


i forget im an adult.
with all my childish antics.
and jovial choices.
and that whole blatant disregard for the future bit.

all of this combined.
takes me back to a better time.
of mixtapes.
and car rides.
windows down.
music loud.

early mornings.
bleeding into late nights.

why cant this be life?
why cant all the gold stay?
why cant we capture yesterdays memories

its the fear of aging.
its the threat of falling
subject to our own kind.

this skin im in is temporary.
so im gonna wear it to the bone.
then leave it behind.

ive been lingering.
between dowtown.
and uptown.

in and out of corridors.
finding loopholes.
in social circles.
dusting cobwebs
in eagles nest.

new years.
bring new intentions.
be them bad.
be them good.
all of us trying to hold our composure.
try not to be lude.

well fuck it,

anything i set to reslove.
might as well have dissolved
a little after midnight.
snap, crackle, pop.

but i still felt alright.

all that was then.
this is twenty ten.
things are different these days.

so watch clocks.
cause times
they are a changing.