i remember me.
and all these things that make up a memory.
things we often turn to forget.
bluring the lines between the things that we keep only to regret.
we all been throught the night with movies and low light.
crying through the good fight.
trying to hit the big one
even if only for tonight.
throwing down the bottle.
trying to be a good girl.
given them what they want.
when all the while we are relishing the thought.
of leaving it all behind.
starting over from the grind.
reworking the plot.
editing the lines.
thank yous in reprive.
holding your breath.
pretending to breathe.
these are all the things i cant shake.
theres nothing familar about feeling content.
ive always been searching. and uneasy.
before their was a void.
not being able to think of what to say.
stumbling over words.
they listen anyway.
and everyone wants to be like that.
you just want to have a good time just like everybody else.
you dont really want to fall apart .
teach yourself resistance.
hesitate is the quickest way to meditation.
and thats the fastest road to hell.
losing yourself in the mess.
stretching your skin to the point of distress.
i just want to have a good time.
just like everybody else.
i dont wanna fall apart this time.
can you show me how you live.
how you walk the way you do.
how to distance yourself from everything in your empty heart.
we are a lot a like.
you and me and she.
we all want to live long and prosper.
they all want to aid in our demise.
sleep next to you
wake up and your gone.
fool you once.
shame on me.
fool you twice.
this ones on you.
over and over.
she says the same things.
reach hoping searching scraping
you dredge the bottom.
hoping for gold.
and all you find is your soul.
and what is left of it.
after you given it to this city that you love.
is that your holier than thou ticket from above.
ive got nothing to add.
nothing to share.
and id rather not bother.
honestly i dont care.
but i do have things inside my head.
and if you ask im sure some of them relate to you.
these thoughts can turn to words.
and the words can cut like knives.
and come soon ill be willing to chop you down.
and i promise.
my aim is true.