wine me, dine me.

ah.
wine.
turkey.
god.
i love the burg.
from its silent streets.

to its seven hills.
as i plaster myself.
to the edge.
of the living room couch.
unfortunately.
in this desolate.
jesus fearing.
seven hill city of a town.
the hardest thing to find.
is a strong signal.

tonite i feel like.
i proved myself.
i showed my growth.
maturity.
through a delicious corn pudding.
and a.
homemade.
stepmother secret
sweet potato pie.
i showed my stability.
by the just the right amount of
cinnamon.
in my candied yams.
by the crunch
of the potato salad.

all those who have come.
to expect the unexpected.
found passion
and honestly.
and responsible.
formed through clever phases.
excitement.
doubt.

and yet.

my family is amazing.
and intricate.
interesting.
they embrace me.
and find me intriguing.
they feed me probing questions.
how strange it is.
years from how we thought we would be.
preconceived notions start deep.
in the blood.
but some how its different.
sometimes.
i think i understand.
all this.
all.
this.
all this
too much.
it kind of takes the fun out of it all.

and sometimes.
i wonder.
whats the difference between this.
or that.
or what makes you a family.
its it the blood.
or the heart.
or the mindfacesoul.
what is it.
that makes this.
all of this.
and that.
a family.

sometimes i feel like.
im me.
and im the only one who knows it.
and that this is it.
and ive finally found.
the only way to show them.

and him.
what about him.
who is this man.
some nights.
the warmth.
he.
i am thankful for.
his breath.
his touch.
his.
heart.
this man.
whos love is only replicated.
in praise or pose.
this man.
who puts a.
comma splice.
between my common sense.
a false sense of security.
to mask the blatant obscurity .
of this situation.
a life time of patience.
giving way to giving in.
the push.
the pull.
life.
finding its way to.
the middle.

balance.

subject.
growth.

with all the terror .
and horror.
and detestation in our lives.
the one thing.
i fear most.
is life.
without.
them.
and
him.
and this.
and those.
ah,
then.

and.
this.

i am thankful.
truly fucking thankful.
to have.
love.
it takes over my life.
love has changed it all.
big.
bad.
love.
flipped the script.
love for.
my family of friends.
and my friends.
that i love.
and my love.
thats my friend.

this.
is.
it.

thank you.